A much more accurate description of the event, in my opinion, would be to say that it sucked. Or, rather, that it completely sucked.
The reason: The folks at Nintendo of America didn't show or even announce a single new 3DS game. Yes, you read that correctly--not a single new 3DS game, first-party or otherwise, was discussed during this so-called showcase.
Because I spent an hour of my time to watch it, though, I've decided to write a blog post about it. Be warned, though: I have almost nothing nice to say about Nintendo this time around.
* I hereby nominate Nate Bihldorff to lead all of Nintendo of America's press events, E3 and otherwise, from here on out--Bihldorff, for those of you who haven't played through games like Animal Crossing and Paper Mario and read their end credits, is a senior localization manager and producer at Nintendo Treehouse. He was brought on stage twice during the 3DS Software Showcase--once to chat about New Super Mario Bros. 2 (below) and once to chat about Paper Mario: Sticker Star--and both times he showed that he has more presence than his superiors, Reggie Fils-Aime and Scott Moffitt, combined. Whereas Moffitt, who headed up this particular presser, was as awkward as can be, Bihldorff was relaxed and even witty. More Bihldorff, less Fils-Aime and Moffitt in the future, please!
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* Thanks for offering up such specific release dates, Nintendo!--In a move that will surprise nearly no one, but will irritate nearly everyone, Moffitt reiterated during the 3DS Software Showcase that the numeral-phobic pair of upcoming releases known as Luigi's Mansion: Dark Moon (below) and Paper Mario: Sticker Star will hit store shelves (and the Nintendo eShop, too, I'm guessing) "this holiday season." Gee, thanks! I'll be sure to circle the entire months of November and December, and maybe even January, on my calendar in anticipation. Really, would it be so hard to provide us 3DS owners with actual release dates? I guess so. At least they didn't leave us hanging in regards to New Super Mario Bros. 2, which will see the light of day--both digitally and at retail--on Aug. 19.
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* If Animal Crossing 3DS isn't released before the end of the year, I'm going to make voodoo dolls that look like Satoru Iwata and send them to anyone who wants one--Unexpectedly, the long-awaited (by me, at least), 3DS-based iteration of Animal Crossing wasn't even mentioned during this so-called showcase. Why? I have no idea. I'm guessing it's because Nintendo of America had too many other great 3DS releases to talk about during this hour-long event. Only they didn't. Like I said earlier, not a single new game was announced yesterday. Even worse, only a handful of previously-announced games were given center stage, with those games being Castlevania: Lords of Shadow--Mirror of Fate (what a great title!), Epic Mickey: Power of Illusion, Luigi's Mansion: Dark Moon, New Super Mario Bros. 2 and Paper Mario: Sticker Star (below). In other words, Moffitt and Bihldorff had plenty of time to toss out a sentence or two about the game that's sure to sell as much as each of the aforementioned titles combined.
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* That's all right, Nintendo, I wasn't planning on buying any more eShop games this year anyway--OK, so that's a lie; I was planning on buying more eShop games this year. Sadly, Nintendo of America decided to mention just two of them during the 3DS Software Showcase: Pokémon Dream Radar and Pokédex 3D Pro. I'm guessing this means the Dragon-Quest-meets-Pikmin curiosity known as Denpa Ningen RPG won't be making its way to our shores anytime soon? If so, bummer.
I could easily add a few more complaints--such as, oh, the fact that Fire Emblem: Awakening was completely ignored--to the list above, but why bother? I'm sure you get the idea that I was more than a bit disappointed (disgusted may be a better word) by Nintendo's 3DS Software Showcase.
Were any of you similarly turned off by the event? If so, what were you hoping the folks at Nintendo of America would discuss or reveal?
See also: 'My one-word review of E3 2012 (thus far): Meh'