Balloon Fighter: 'The Fred Flintstone to the Joust knight’s Ralph Kramden'

If you haven't been paying attention to the game character "profiles" that have been posted to gamespite.net in the past month or so, get your posterior over there right now and start reading through them.

My favorite so far focuses on Balloon Fight's pixelated protagonist.

For starters, writer Bob Mackey lists the following as one of Balloon Fighter's strengths: "Can honestly say he just flew in from L.A. and boy are his arms tired." (I know, I have a horrible sense of humor.)

And then there's the author's explanation as to why the brass at Nintendo haven't given Balloon Fighter a second shot at gaming stardom.

"In the few additions to the Balloon Fight franchise, Balloon Fighter didn’t even make the cut; first he was replaced by a little girl in the overlooked Game Boy sequel, then by pan-sexual man-thing Tingle in a Japanese Club Nintendo exclusive remake," Mackey writes. "What you hear is the sound of karma catching up with a character who entered this world as a shameless ripoff to begin with."