Does anyone write better press releases than the folks at Atlus?

The answer to that question, of course, is an emphatic "no." Case in point, the Irvine, Calif.-based company's latest piece of PR wizardry:

ATLUS ENDS YEARS OF ALLEGEDLY NOT PRINTING ENOUGH COPIES OF GAMES AND THEN LAUGHING AT EMPTY-HANDED CUSTOMERS, RELEASES DIGITAL DOWNLOAD VERSIONS OF PSP® SYSTEM CLASSICS VIA PlayStation®NETWORK

Not you, though. We were only laughing at the other guys.

IRVINE, CALIFORNIA -- OCTOBER 23, 2009 -- Atlus U.S.A., Inc. today broke from its supposed practice of undersupplying the retail channel and guffawing as fans desperately scramble to find one of only dozens of copies of a game by releasing a number of titles from its PSP® (PlayStation®Portable) system library via PlayStation®Network: Crimson Gem Saga™, Hammerin' Hero™, Yggdra Union™, Steambot Chronicles Battle Tournament™, R-Type Command™, and Riviera: The Promised Land™. As digital downloads, the games no longer threaten fans with feelings of guilt and remorse for not pre-ordering or purchasing at launch, and instead now allow for pajama-clad living room shopping from an unlimited inventory.

"We've finally reached a point where, according to our physicians, any further laughing at our masterfully executed plan of never making enough copies of our games for everyone poses risks to our health," admitted Aram Jabbari, Manager of PR and Sales at Atlus. "In order to prevent illness, and because, hey, sometimes you just want to change things up, we're very pleased to offer PSP system classics via digital download. It may mean that we'll have to shut down our numerous online auction accounts, as we won't be able to hoard large quantities of our hard-to-find games and then slowly trickle them out at obscenely high prices anymore, but the end result will be better for everyone."

The Atlus PSP system legacy titles now available for digital download cover a broad range of genres, so whatever your fancy, there's something to strike it. If you prefer action-packed platforming, you'll love Hammerin' Hero. If you're more into hot-and-heavy mech-on-mech action, then Steambot Chronicles Battle Tournament is right up your alley. Crimson Gem Saga offers classic RPG fans with an epic adventure laced with interesting characters and witty dialogue. Riviera: The Promised Land provides a unique take on the JRPG and an immersive story about a war between gods and demons, while strategy fans are sure to enjoy the deep, rewarding gameplay of Yggdra Union and R-Type Command.

I swear, if I lived in (or around) Irvine, Calif., instead of Seattle, I'd do whatever I could to secure a job in Atlus' PR department.